Did you say you want a Tiger Beer or a Thai Girl?

For the last 6-7 years, I've celebrated New Years in Manhattan or Hyderabad. This year, since Vidya was going to be in town, we all decided to do something different. We initially decided to go on a family vacation, including my aunt, uncle and grandparents. However, over the course of 3 months, our new years trip morphed from a family vacation in Kerala to a no adults, party of 12 heading to Phuket.

Thailand is a spectacular country and has a lot of great things to offer...the scenery is beautiful, the culture is rich and if you like Buddhism, probably no better place to be. But unless you're under the age of 16 or a boring suburban couple which thinks Benihana is "exciting and exotic", these are not the primary things you think of when Thailand comes to mind. Despite all the things Thailand has to offer, most people come here to party and do things they would probably be sent to jail for in their home country.

Phuket during New Years is essentially like a Cancun Spring Break on steroids...the only difference is that there are a lot more Europeans which means Speedos, questionable moral standards and a lot more debauchery. Throw in the transvestites, hookers "go-go bars" and the lack of no-open container rules and you've got a bad, bad situation on your hands. What kind of situations? Well, I probably had the most PG night of anyone in our group and I still found myself screaming the new year countdown next to a transvestite hooker who was chugging a beer while spraying people with silly string. There is a big party street in Phuket, about 5 blocks of bars, which was packed. It's not as intense or as shady as Bangkok, but it comes pretty close and being on the beach only helps increase the energy. We primarily stayed at 2 bars for most of the night where we were challenged to games of Connect4 by the bartenders and other games like banging nails into a tree. Not sure about you, but I don't think it's ever a good idea to give a drunk person a hammer and nail...just not smart. A majority of my night consisted of Vidya and I trying to figure out if people in the bar were guys or girls...we both had our own methodologies. I looked for an Adam's Apple while she looked at their hands. Other random things happened including everyone seeing a tiny Thai police officer taser a huge Australian, seeing hookers pick up dirty old European men and watching girls who shouldn't be on stage...pole dancing. There are a lot more unmentionable things that happened over the course of our nights out and if you've ever been to SE Asia, you know exactly what I'm talking about. For those of you who don't, to sum it up...if you're easily offended or a strong proponent of women's rights...nightlife in Thailand is probably not the best thing to do.

With the exception of one person, Vidya, Harsha and I were the oldest in the group. We all like to have fun but we've had our fair share of partying over the last several years...nothing wrong going out but no one wants (or should be) the 26 year old screaming "Jagerbombs!" at the bar. (For the record, I did have 6 shots of Jager and 1 Jagerbomb on this trip...please don't judge) Let's be honest, we're not laughing with the cast of the Jersey Shore, we're usually laughing at them and their douchiness. To the dismay of my 20 year old twin cousins, we booked our rooms at a Marriott resort club instead of being in the city with everyone else. I've stayed at enough dicey hotels/hostels (wondering if your bag was still going to be there after your shower), used the so-so bathrooms (the toilets in our Beijing hostel were so disgusting that I didn't do #2 until I got back to the airport)...this time I wanted a nice resort where someone would greet me with mixed drink when I arrived and would cater to anything I wanted. We lounged and it was great...I might not necessarily stay at a resort again but it was nice to have a vacation where I actually got to relax instead of sleeping in a tent, hiking 15 miles a day or glacier hiking in the rain. Perhaps the Ladakh experience was more scarring than I realized?

I had the option of 4 hour Thai cooking classes by the river and 90 minutes massages on the beach OR bar hoping at 12 in the afternoon. I think by now you can realize what I decided to go with...

When we flew back this weekend, Harsha and I went through our usual self-pity motions that we always do when we're back in Hyderabad. However, as I had my eyes closed on my train ride to Guntur, I tried to think of some more positive aspects of Hyderabad. Since I don't like to party as late into the night, I realized the fact that everything shuts down here by midnight is actually a huge plus for me. I smiled and opened my eyes, only to see a huge fat guy across the row from me, laying on his seat, with his hands in his pants vigorously scratching himself.

Why Hyderabad, why?

And on a random note, I quickly reflected on 2009...in the past year, I climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro, quit my first job out of college, fulfilled a dream of driving across America, moved 9,000 miles from home, took a job with the family business and nearly died in Ladakh...seems like an exciting enough year but somehow I feel 2010 is going to be a lot crazier and even more exhilarating.