Hacky Sack with a shuttlecock and other observations

This week marks six months since I moved to Wuhan. Needless to say, my 6 months has been a whirlwind and a complete adventure. Since China is so foreign and also because I've been outside Wuhan for 2 of my 6 months, I'm only now really starting to feel comfortable and settled down.

Wuhan is clearly different from living in a quasi-international city such as Shanghai or Beijing. While no one would dare compare Wuhan to those cities, the city also doesn't have the cachet of Guangzhou, Nanjing or Chongqing (Trust me, anyone who knows anything about SE Asia knows those cities. It's like saying you know America but not recognizing Chicago, Boston or San Francisco) While Wuhan might not be well known outside China, it is a legitimate Chinese city and probably one of the top cities outside the names I just mentioned. The downside of living in a Tier II city is that I'm constantly being teased by slivers of a Western life...sure, we have Starbucks, but just 2 for a city of 10 million. Ditto for Papa Johns. Of course the clear upside is that I live in an honest to God Chinese city. Wuhan is real China...unlike people in Shanghai who already emulating a Western life, people in Wuhan have just gotten to the door and are peering in.

Whether I like it or not, everyday, I get to see how a typical Chinese person lives. So what have I observed in six months?

Observation #1 - Chinese people don't care for small talk

I'm a typical American, when I see someone, I go "hey, how are you?" My Chinese counterparts don't understand this and it's easy to see why. What's the point of asking someone every day how they are...do you really care? Even if you do, how often have people said anything different from 'I'm good" or some variation of it? Even when I'm having a so-so day, I don't tell people.

People in my office have reacted to my daily "how are you" question in 2 ways...

1. There are people such as Mr. Yi who ask me how I am because they want to get into the habit of learning the nuances of the West. However, they giggle when they ask me which makes me think:

a. They think it's silly but will play along
b. They're quasi-patronizing me

2. This is better served by providing an example....last week, I asked Grace how she was and she goes "why do you ask me this every time? you see me every day, we work together and then I go home, nothing changes. I was fine yesterday, I am fine today"

Duly noted.

Observation #2 - Chinese people don't care what people think of them

Remember in college, someone in your class would roll in wearing flannel pajama pants and a sweatshirt? They'd practically be screaming "Vanity be damned, I want to be comfortable" Or that one girl who wore a top about 4 sizes too small for her?

Imagine if 1.6 billion people had that mentality.

People here have confidence, I simply have no other way of putting it. Every day, I see tons of people rocking pajamas. I'm not talking about on Sunday morning to quickly run to the newstand, I'm talking about men wearing silk robes walking the aisles of Wal-Mart on a Tuesday afternoon. There is no such thing as social norm here, people do whatever they please. (On a side note, one of my suppliers gave me golden silk pajamas...they're amazing)

Another great example, women and their skirts. Typically, you see teenage girls or 20-somethings wearing mini-skirts or Daisy-Duke shorts...not here. Woman of all ages (and sizes) wear the skimpiest clothes you can imagine. To top it off, they wear those clothes to work. There are 6 women in my group, every single one of them has worn Daisy-Duke shorts this summer. Some of the outfits borderline ridiculous and I can't tell if they're planning on going straight to the beach from work.

But my personal favorite? The optional shirt rule. As I mentioned before, Wuhan is one of the hottest cities in China. During August, the heat index would regularly hit 140 degrees. Since it's hot, there is an unwritten rule about wearing shirts...mainly, it's optional.

Without getting into too much detail, here is a brief recap...

The Good - Shirts are optional
The Bad - Not for women
The Ugly - Seems to be more of a rule than option for overweight Chinese men

Observation #3 - In a Chinese person's eyes, a white male can only have 2 purposes

This is fairly straight forward. If you're a budding Chinese entrepreneur, a white male is your best friend...you need to ensure you have a white person on a poster holding your product, it instantly adds credibility. If you recall, I had an article on Facebook a few months that talked about Chinese people hiring white people to go to meetings with them.

On the flip side, if you're in entertainment, a white male is always a good villain. In one quick swoop, you can show your audience that the 'foreign devil' is ignorant and is always bound to fail, particularly when they challenge Jet Li to a fight.

Do these roles contradict one another? Yup. Can white people have other roles within China? Absolutely not.

Observation #4 - Chinese people like to keep things simple (or truly believe in the concept of ignorance is bliss)

"Sharon, what am I eating?"
"Meat"
"Yes, I know. But what kind of meat?"
"Meat"
"I know, meat from what animal?"
"Cow"
"What part of the cow?"
"What does it matter?"

or

"Vijay, what do you want to drink?"
"What are my choices?"
"Alcohol or beer"
"Alcohol or beer?"
"Yes, alcohol or beer" *said very slowly since I clearly didn't understand*
"What kind of alcohol?"
"Strong alcohol"

Observation #5 - Chinese people aren't subtle

People are enamored by my good looks (it's better to lie to myself than accept they stare because I look weird to them) so I can't fault Chinese people for staring at me. Now, everyone, everywhere stares...just a fact. Indians are notorious for this, however no one can beat the Chinese for how shameless they are. In my building, when I get on the elevator, I stand in the back...on several occasions, people will literally turn around and look at me during the entire elevator ride down. Best yet, they'll occasionally talk about me to their friends while they're staring at me. Pretty amazing.

On a more amusing note, over the summer, several people brought their kids to work. Since I have a glass wall to my office, everyone can look into my office. Everyday for 1 month, two little girls, would stand outside my office and stare. Not for a minute, for an hour. They'd even sit down and watch me...if I looked up, they'd squeal and run away.

After a few weeks, they started to make faces so I decided to play along...then I realized, slanting my eyes would probably be offensive. With that out of my arsenal, all i could muster was blowing my cheeks and sticking my tongue out at them.

Observation #6 - Chinese people are honest with themselves

We lie to ourselves all the time. We act sincere when we're not, we pretend we're doing things for the common good when it's really just another way to get ahead, the list is endless....or maybe I'm just a terrible person?

In an interview, when you're asked why you want the job, you typically say something like this:

"it's a great opportunity and will be a way for me to fully challenge myself"

a Chinese person would say this:

"I hear you can make lots of money"

Basically, Chinese people have no qualms...they're all like Nietzsche, but on crack. For all this talk about Confucius, the Chinese really have one purpose in life. To win and become rich. Two weeks ago, I visited a supplier, the owner of the company had a throne in his office.

Seriously. An actual throne.

What better way to show you've made it? Maybe an Audi isn't direct enough, after all, anyone can buy an Audi...but how many people can have a throne? Like I said, they're honest people.

I was going to go with 10 observations but I'm feeling lazy so I'll end with this

Observation #7 - Chinese people are among the friendliest people in the world

All jokes aside, Chinese people are super friendly. Sure their curiosity can make them appear rude and they are sometimes a bit too upfront but at the end of the day, they're a fun group. I'm a complete outsider who can't speak the language yet people, even random people, have done everything they can to help me out. I went to a noodle place by myself and randomly pointed at items...since that day, the noodle lady near my office starts making me breakfast the second she sees me in the morning. The guy who washes my car has started to learn small english words "welcome" "please sit" in order to impress me.

This might not seem like a big deal to you, but could you imagine people being this friendly and learning a few words of a foreign language for a random Chinese person who moved to Iowa?

Yeah, exactly.

Before I wrap up, Charlie sent me this link...I think it's perfect

http://www.littleredbook.cn/2010/08/20/the-sexual-dilemma-of-the-chinese-woman/

And for people still wondering about the title of this blog, when I'm in the park across the street, I see people play hacky sack with a shuttlecock, which in my mind, defeats the purpose of hacky sack..or it's a genius game for lazy people.